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I’m not telling my name!

Age when it happend: 17
Where it happened: My brother's bed-but NOT with my brother!!
Langauge: English
Sex: Female
Rating: 5
Category: Straight

Let’s back up to how we met first sice it was unusual for the time and so you will know why it was where it was.

We’d just gotten a compter and internet access in my house back in 1998. Three days before Valentin’es to be exact. Well, the night before was Friday, so my parents were out on a “date” and my ever popular brother was at the school dance. I was home alone and in an AOL chat room. About two dozen guys IMed me after I hit 17/f for the age’sex thing asked sometimes. I decided to IM back the guy with the coolest name between the ages of 17 and 20. One guy’s name was Jordan. After IMing I gave him my number. He called and we talked for hours. But something just felt so right. We planned to meet, except he was 3,000 miles away.

I elaborated a story to tell my parents about him, too in depth to go into here. But let’s say it ended with them thinking he moved and they decided to let him visit a week in August of 1998. He was 18 when we met and would be 19 by then. Between V-day and this time we talked a good 30-40 hours a week-on his mom’s phone bill. She was not happy with those bills!

Come the night he was flying in. My parents waited near the smoking area (filthy habit) while I waited in the terminal. So we met in person finally! In the car on the way home he said, “So this is such-and-such (city name),” as if he hadn’t been there before. Which he hadn’t, but my parents thought he had lived there! Fast forward. He was sleeping in my brother’s room while he was visiting relatives that week. I was in my room. My parents’ room was, conveniently enough for them, situated right between ours.

Well, the next morning my Dad had gone to work and my mom, who worked swing shift as a nurse, was sleeping and would be out cold half the day. Now I had only gotten my first kiss the night before. Boldly I donned a skimpy little scrap of ligerie and my scraggly robe and walked slowly to his room. He asked if I was naked under the robe and I told him, “Well, nooooo…..” We had talked for a few months about having sex. I thought he had slept with someone else (it was a lie since he thought I would think he was a loser for being a virgin when all it was was that he didn’t want meaningless sex). So we we both virgins, but only he knew. Which explains what happened soon after.

He slowly untied my robe and I laid down on the bed, my brother’s bed. We fooled around a bit, but being that I came from a super sheltered world, knew very little about erections and what the hell an orgasm was. Embarassingly enough I was in the advanced class at school. Finally he got on top of me and prepared to go into me. (I was on the Pill, which we also talked about previously-I told my mom I wanted the Pill to help regulate my perdiod, which was true, but she didn’t know this….) But then he went soft. He told me he was nervous about hurting me. Partially true. He was also a little nervous about losing his virginity to a minor.

So we got dressed, but barely an hour later ended right back up where we started. Only this time it happened.

It didn’t hurt like we thought it might, it wasn’t the best physical-pleasure wise eigher. But it was us joining together, soul mates. All the details I will keep to myself for “a woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets….”

He propsed Christmas night of that year, not three weeks after I turned 18, at his home. The most romantic proposal, a five-stone, 1ct. ring on bended knee and all.

Now it is the beginning of 2003. Our wedding has been cancelled three times due to my horrid health. Remember I said soul mates? Only a soul mate would go through what he’s been through (I have been unable to work for three years due to helth and he’s had to support us by himself at just 23-in San Fransisco no less!) and still be with me, as dedicated as ever. Through the loss of one child, only to find out I can no longer have kids, everything that can happed to tear a relationship apart we have survived. Try me. You can e-mail me at panleiseracom and try me.

But I want to stress don’t have sex with the first person you come across who is willing. We’d both had other chances. We were still young, yes, but due to circumstances in both our lives, we’d been forced to be wise beyond our years, essentially having our childhoods taken from us. I guarantee you that you will NEVER look back and regret having waited. But you probably will look back and regret doing it too soon. Maybe not 5 years from now, maybe not 10. But you will. You have a lifetime ahead of you. Plus it bites that the novelty wears off. Don’t blow that. There are many more ways to show each other how you feel, ways more precious even than sex. You may think that sex is the closets way two people can be together, but it’s not. Souls mingling together is. And if it’s meant to be between two people, then waiting a few more months won’t hurt. To girls especially. If you think he’s “the one” and he’s persistent to have sex NOW or SOON, then he’s not, because “the one” will wait an eternity for you.

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