It was a windy evening, in the Summer, in Cape Town. We had both planned to do it, since it was the first time for both of us. We both wanted it to be perfect, though it probably was not.
As we walked hand in hand, I remember thinking, will I satisfy her, will I be satisfied, will it be everything that I had hoped it would be. We began with subtle foreplay, fondling each other, caressing each other, but we were both very tense, so I suggested that we relax and take in some fresh air, for a while. Then she asked me, if I had remembered to bring protection, I said yes. We began to kiss and I my penis got so hard it was painful. I touched her by her genital area, and she squirmed, saying softly that I have to do it now. We both undressed in under 10 s, kissing and fondling each other wildly by now. As I looked at her genital area, I remember thinking that she is bigger and fatter than I envisaged, and as I penetrated her subtly, she squeeled violently, and I got a fright, and wanted to remove myself from her, but she pulled me down with her legs, that were wrapped around me. I started with short entries, choosing to make her feel comfortable, but it quickly developed into deeper thrusts that sent her arching her back, but yet still squeeling as if in pain. While busy I remembered that I had forgotten to slip on the condom, and that put even more strain on the already uncomfortable situation, because 2 minutes into the endeavour, I felt that I was gonna ejaculate, and I was worried that I was not gonna satisfy her. I ejaculated and just lay there on top of her, not knowing what to say, with my, by now, limp penis still inside her. I was tired, felt like sleeping, was worried about her, but the feeling that topped them all was the feeling of finely being called a “man” among my fellow friends. I remember it was still cool in those days to brag a little about your conquests. I layed on top of her for another minute or so till I felt her move below me. I got up, pulled up my and pants, helped her up, and we went off, not saying a word to each other, untill we reached her home, said goodnight, then she whispered that it was okay. I remember thinking that okay was not what I had in mind, but I lied to her and said that it was everything that I hoped it would be. We parted and as I lay on my bed I remember feeling mixed emotions, sometimes experiencing intense joy, then suddenly immense depression. I did not go to sleep that night. The time was much better, with the same girl, but that is an entirely different story.
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Midnight man
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