Shelley

The first time I did it was very disappointing even though I was very curious and excited and wanted to do it. It was all my cousin’s fault because as it turned out he knew far less than I did how to do it, even though he was 14 and I was 8. But we also didn’t get enough time. It happened, but only just and not much, as you will see.

We had a family reunion weekend at my grandparents house, and my 2 brothers and I were playing outside with him. They went inside for a drink or something. He was peaking under my dress which made me feel excited. So I ask him if he would like to have a proper look and he said yes. So we went into our grandparents’ garage and I lifted my dress and pulled my panties aside. He stared at what he could see. He just kept looking so it might have been the first time he had ever seen a girl’s cunt. Then we heard my brothers coming and so we stopped. Later we were alone inside the house and he started to explain to me about putting his into me. I knew about that. So he said could we try. So we went into my grandparents’ bedroom, and I took my swimsuit down and then he said bend over. I did what he told me. I felt his penis against my bottom and I bent over more and put my legs apart. I knew where it should go but it whe didn’t. He kept pushing away, I liked the feel of his but it wasn’t going in. “There’s no hole THERE” I said. Then we had to stop as we heard voices coming.

The next day we both looked for opportunities to continue. We went into some long grass and I took down my pants, spread my legs and peed in the grass so he could see my hole. He took his thing out and it was very big and stiff. I had only felt it on me the day before, and I told him it was a lot bigger than my brothers. He said it got big so it could go inside me and that made sense because their little floppys would not have gone inside me, especially as I felt how tight the entrance to my hole was, what I now know are like lips. Once again we didn’t get enough time, until a little while later we had a chance. Once again he said for me to bend over and tried to get in from behind. Then I realised it was like he was somehow confused between my two holes or somehow thought it would be easier to get in that way. At that point I decided that I was fed up with him not knowing what to do. I knew where it ws supposed to go. SoI turned around and lay down on the ground and at last he started to get the message. I opened my knees wide and he saw my hole and put his penis against it. As his tip touched me there, in the proper place at last, I gave a little cry. Not to stop him, though. Just a little whimper. That was the first time I felt a bit scared. I was really going to be fucked by a boy. But I didn’t want him to stop. He pushed against me a little. The tip of his penis got just inside my little slit, not much in , but I could feel that it was in. At the time I really didn’t know how far–later I though it was probably not even the whole tip. But it was like I could really feel a bit of him inside me. Not just pushing at me outside. I didn’t know what would happen next. But as he paused a bit I felt really excited. It was like he was getting ready to go in a bit further. Then suddenly we heard somone coming. He stopped and stood up from me, and quickly did up his pants. I stood up, pulled up my panties and brushed off the leaves from my dress. And we just walked out and saw my mother coming. She looked a bit suspicious and asked us what we were doing. Nothing, we said. Just going inside. I think we tried to look bored. But inside I was angry. A bit scared for almost being caught. But more than a bit mad–at him.

We never got another chance. I think our parents might have suspected something but my mother never said much. For years, we didn’t meet much except with everyone else present. Once I saw him with his girlfriend, when he was about 17. And whenever we did meet much later, we were both married, and saw each other only every few years. I didn’t know what he felt, but I have remained a bit embatrressed and still annoyed at him. He had his big chance and blew it. But I still count it as the first time for me.

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