Where it happened: in a camping tent in the middle of the woods
Langauge: english
Sex: Female
Rating: 7
Category: Straight
Everything in my life has typically happened as some might say “according to plan”, that is, how most would think a normal life might play out. I usually get what I want in a relatively socially accepted manner. Or, stuff usually happens to me the way I expect it will according to what my friends, the television, and modern society say it will.
My first time was no exception. I’m dating this really cute life guard I met when I worked at the pool over the summer, the perfect start to a romance. We get fairly close over the months (yes, months…), and become what some might call a perfect couple. Pretty soon, as my first boy friend, he is pressuring me into doing things I’d never done before, things that involve more self-confidence than I’d ever had in the past due to the fact that I was 40 pounds heavier in high school. He says this is just because I’ve never had a boyfriend before and I will get over it. And willing, unsure, persuadable me went along with it.
Just last December, we had it all planned out. Of course he was willing, and I was always curious, so neither of us met the resistance I needed to accept my needs. To some extent, I was proud I was still a virgin and usually got good responses from others in the form of admiration and amazement that I lasted this long when I told them I’d never done it. And, like many others, I didn’t want to lose it in a dormitory bed, unplanned, only to regret not making it special later.
So we went camping for the weekend, bought condoms and other items we might need, and did it on our first night alone, there on the hard ground with a single sleeping bag between us and the hard ground. Mr. Eagle Scout didn’t know how to start a fire, and forgot a pillow, so we used his duffel bag as a hard, lumpy head rest, and shivered together under his blanket as the moon shone somewhat ironically through the roof of the tent.
I’ll admit, it was fairly special at the time. Again, by some miraculous social obligation, it unfolded exactly as one might hope – it didn’t hurt, I ended up being pretty darn good at it, and we carried on until sunrise. But what most people who’ve only read it in books have to understand is that nothing feels that special unless it’s hyped up in a smutty romance novel written for people who can’t experience these things for themselves.
Long story short, after seeing the play tonight I had to write and submit my own story. It gave me really mixed feelings about my decision to be pressured into doing it for my boyfriend whom I currently feel attached to for that very reason. I realized the other day that if we weren’t having sex, our relationship would be rather dull, and I would probably be with someone who could fulfill other needs that he can’t…
I think what your site does is great, I just wish it hadn’t made me realize the things I have. I’m not sure what to do, or what my take on future sex will be. At this point I am very resentful toward my boyfriend and never want to sleep with him again (I wouldn’t be missing much anyway). I wonder if the pharmacy takes back unused birth control?
Thank you again for providing this site. It makes me so angry at the whole male species, sad that women go through so much worse, glad that my first time wasn’t god awful compared to others I’ve heard, and ambivalent about my relationship situation.
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