Babysitter Blues ),=

I dont want to remember it and I can t believe I'm gonna put it on here. My old babysitter was always saying stuff sexual to me, stuff that made me feel uncomfortable. When I was nine he kept in asking me if we could do a thing called "sex" which involved nme taking my clothes off but I always refused. I didn't see him on my tenth birthday but the day after he babysitted me again. He told me I was a big enough girl to have sex but I refused again. We were in his room at the time. He locked the door and started takeing off his clothes. then he came at me. He pushed me against a wall and took og my tshirt and I hit him. He then pushed me on his bed where he tied my arms down, the he went to take my skirt and panties off so I kicked him. He then knocked me out. When I woke up I was completely tied, I couldn't move and he was inside me. Seeing I was awake he started fucking me harder.He then got me to do sexual favours for him. I didn't tell anyone and it wasn't till we moved away that it stopped. I blame myself, if I told someone my life would be so much easier. If you are the victim of rape tell someone because if you dont things can get worse, trust me, I know